Chad and I are having an argument and I need the blog/facebook world to weigh in on it. :)
Here is the question:
At what age is it appropriate for a girl to be taught not to wear sleeveless clothes? (Sleeveless being defined as anything less than 2-3 inches in width)
Please share your opinion and back it up with why you have that opinion, including your personal experience, what you've read in books, or logical trains of thought.
Thanks!
I personally think that they don't ever need to wear sleeveless clothes. That way, you won't have to "teach" them...modesty is just ingrained in their upbringing. And really, does it affect a little girl at all if she wears a shirt with sleeves vs. a shirt without sleeves? I don't think so. I don't think they know any difference, or care. So why even start? Just dress your kid modestly from Day 1, and they'll be more likely to stay modest later, because it's what they know and are used to. That goes for little kid bikinis, too. I see no point, when there are plenty of one piece suits out there.
ReplyDeleteAnother thought: Think about the two different conversations -- Scenario 1: Your kid never wore sleeveless clothes, and now you need to explain modesty to them...fairly easy, and being LDS, you can use church publications (such as "For Stregth of Youth") to back up your view. Scenario 2: Your kid wore sleeveless clothes and now you need to explain to them why modesty as a bigger kid is different from modesty as little kid. There is no logical explanation. It would just be made up excuses, with no church literature to back you up. Okay...I'm done. :)
ReplyDeleteAnna has always worn dresses with sleeves. In fact, my sister got married a couple of years ago and tried to talk her into a sleeveless flower girl dress, but Anna knew she needed sleeves. If that has always been the rule then it will be easier to enforce! It's almost impossible to find cute spring dresses with sleeves, but we have found cute cardigans to wear over, or shirts to go underneath. This year I am attempting to sew one for her, and you know what has been the hardest part? The sleeves!
ReplyDeleteJess
I don't necessarily disagree with the above comments. I think it is fine to teach it from the beginning. But it can be a little bit extreme if we think that it is immodest to wear sleeveless clothing at 1 or 2 years old. Heck... a kid can run around naked at that age and it's not immodest. They are not aware of their bodies yet. I took pictures of my kids in the bathtub when they were little, now... it wouldn't be appropriate. Know what I mean? I guess I have that worry because I saw a non-member give a member of my family a sleeveless dress for her 18 month old and was told "thank you, but I don't think that's appropriate." It can go too far in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteHowever... the world being what it is... girls are MADE aware far too early of how they can use their bodies for attention. I heard on the news a few weeks ago that Abercrombie and Fitch has released a swimwear line with PADDED bikini tops for 7 and 8 year old. PADDED!! It makes me feel ill. Lizzy was probably 3 or 4 when I watched her playing princess dress up one day and she pulled the sleeves off of her shoulders (for an off-the-shoulder look) because she was imitating princesses like Belle and Jasmine. That's when I felt like she was becoming aware of her body being something separate. I certainly didn't tell her it was naughty or immediately go and remove any sleeveless dresses in her closet, but I usually bought dresses with sleeves after that. We talked about how part of being a princess is to be respectful of your body by keeping it private and covered nicely. It hasn't really been much of an issue for us except that now we have discussions regularly because she doesn't want to wear shorts under her dresses and I insist.
After reading the other mom's post about their girls I am very glad I have boys! I teach them modest stuff like belts on Sunday to keep from their butt crack from showing. But I don't even come close to respecting their bodies like the girls have to. The Rachelle's barbie story really hit me. My boys and I have never talked about what "other boys do or other boys on tv do or how Disney character dress" In their minds they do don't associate themselves with other males. One time someone gave us a bog of hand me down close and there was a wife beater in it and they asked why I through it in the garbage.
ReplyDeleteLet us know what you decide.