Daughters, plural

My biggest challenge these last few weeks has been trying to figure out how to have a better relationship with Jozie. When you just have one kid that kid feels like an extension of yourself and you can adore them all you want to. When I brought Haven home, there was a very real emotional change that occurred. Suddenly Jozie was not the only little me. It felt, too, like she aged several years that first week home with Haven. I hadn't realized how big she was until I was regularly carrying around a newborn again. I think that realization has made me get a little more serious with teaching her responsibility (which includes discipline) than I had been before, for better or worse. In addition, there's been more resistance on Jozie's part as far as doing what I usually ask her to do.

I've spent lots of nights in tears after battling with Jozie to get her PJs on (or at least let me get them on her), get her teeth brushed, and clean up her toys. Chad and I have experimented with various ways to entice her to clean up, etc. We're still experimenting. Anyway, one of the greatest gifts I received for my birthday was an afternoon of my mom watching Haven (my mom is such a great support) so I could devote all my attention to Jozie. It was so, so wonderful to play alone with her like the old days, and I could feel how much she enjoyed it and that she does love me after all. :) Jozie hasn't been openly aggressive towards Haven for a long time, but interestingly, after our play-date yesterday afternoon she was that way again, which confirmed to me that Jozie is feeling at least a little bit resentful about this change.

I'm working on consciously spending part of Haven's nap time just playing with Jozie, rather than being enticed by trying to clean the house during that time. I think it has helped.

Haven has been really helpful, for a baby. There are times that she's perfectly content to lay alone by herself. She never cries while I shower as long as she can lay in the bathroom and listen to the water running or look at the bright lights or something (there's something magical about the bathroom for her). She loves her crib mobile. And, she sleeps like clockwork from 9pm to 3:30am. She's a beautiful baby who smiles a lot, is starting to "talk," and will snuggle into you.